Or not.
When life does wonders...is my most beloved album. These photos bring back the memories which I still believe to be figments of my imagination. Now four months into my new solitary independent life in indore..far far away from my home.... .mumbai, things seem different.
I wish to understand love for it seems to be one of the most complicated emotions I have ever encountered. I think it all began with me being tired of seeing all my best friends taken one after the other.
No one is in state of absolute satisfaction yet they all pretend to have great fun. I very much doubt if there can be any one who would actually qualify to be over my family and friends! Being independent is something I have always cherished. But no one ever told me, that independence brings along with it too many unwanted guests. Foremost among them, compromise. Wish I could phrase my inner conundrum more efficiently.
I had been warned that my decision to re-locate will lead me to absolute emotional wreckage. I defied, trusted my bravado, and now I guess I am failing. Not attending family gatherings, betraying friends in their most cherished occasions, staying alone, claiming blissful happiness, I am sick of the charade.
My options are wide open, all I have to do is QUIT.
And then sit at truly lovely home and be a part of all that i have missed so far, and again, be the best daughter, the sister, the friend.....and......... be.....just another daughter, another sister....another friend.....and someday.....another wife...and on and on....lost in the multitude of beings......blissful oblivion....
I came here to be just me.....god!! how difficult can it be.....
When life does wonders...is my most beloved album. These photos bring back the memories which I still believe to be figments of my imagination. Now four months into my new solitary independent life in indore..far far away from my home.... .mumbai, things seem different.
I wish to understand love for it seems to be one of the most complicated emotions I have ever encountered. I think it all began with me being tired of seeing all my best friends taken one after the other.
No one is in state of absolute satisfaction yet they all pretend to have great fun. I very much doubt if there can be any one who would actually qualify to be over my family and friends! Being independent is something I have always cherished. But no one ever told me, that independence brings along with it too many unwanted guests. Foremost among them, compromise. Wish I could phrase my inner conundrum more efficiently.
I had been warned that my decision to re-locate will lead me to absolute emotional wreckage. I defied, trusted my bravado, and now I guess I am failing. Not attending family gatherings, betraying friends in their most cherished occasions, staying alone, claiming blissful happiness, I am sick of the charade.
My options are wide open, all I have to do is QUIT.
And then sit at truly lovely home and be a part of all that i have missed so far, and again, be the best daughter, the sister, the friend.....and......... be.....just another daughter, another sister....another friend.....and someday.....another wife...and on and on....lost in the multitude of beings......blissful oblivion....
I came here to be just me.....god!! how difficult can it be.....
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| From the album: When life does wonders |
